Intelligence Trumps Corruption?

John Mozeliak.jpgroland burris rod blagojevich.jpg
A smile, a wink and a good old fashioned Chicago roundhouse to the face and everyone seems to have forgotten that Rod Blagojevich is the scum of the earth who not only embarrassed the millions of people who chose him to lead but also tainted the already highly critiqued political machine known as the City of Broad Shoulders.  And let me tell ya: it’s really friggin’ hard to embarrass a city known to root for those lovable bastions of disappointment: the Chicago Cubs.

Indeed, after a brilliant array of surreptitious spin-doctoring, both Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid and President-Elect Barack Obama swiveled from one extreme to the other and now favor seating Blago-appointee and Chicago granddaddy of patronage, Roland Burris, to the US senate.  To quote Jack Buck, “Excuse me while I stand and applaud.”

(*clap, clap, clap)

Yes, dear readers, Rod Blagojevich may appear to be a complete idiot, but his sinisterly savvy move of handpicking Burris to take Obama’s place (accented by the potentially trumping race card) just proves that he’s way smarter than anyone ever thought.  In fact…

Dude is wicked smah’t.

Meanwhile, many of you may see my flippant ferments to dispel equally corrupt John Mozeliak from the Cardinals’ helm as mere exercise in futile hyperbole, but believe me when I declare my absolute sincerity — that my dissatisfaction stems from a sound place: my undying loyalty to preserve the winning spirit of St. Louis Cardinals baseball.

Whether you like it or not, Mozeliak is corrupt.  Anyone who thinks he can throw around pretentiousness disguised as frugality in the Cardinals’ front office is corrupt.  Anyone who squashes the fans’ perennial hopes for a pennant (before the season even starts) while the hated Cubbies build and build and build only to get better, is corrupt.  Anyone who “rebuilds” a severely damaged bullpen by signing the likes of a lukewarm lefty named Trever Miller or Royce Ring — mere band-aids on a gaping, gushing head-wound — is corrupt.

tony larussa dave duncan.jpgYeah, sure, Tony LaRussa is extremely intelligent — so much so that he hid Mozeliak’s ineptitude for most of the 2008 season.  With Dave Duncan at his side, it’s no secret that LaRussa has fixed many a troubled bargain-bin pitcher — whatever riff-raff Mozeliak (and Jocketty before him) could dig up and throw his way.  But how long can we expect TLR’s elite level of intelligence to conceal the GM’s corruption?

One of these days (probably sooner than later) LaRussa and Dunc are simply gonna get tired of the b.s. and walk away.

One of these days (probably sooner than later) the Illinois legislature (and the Democrats as a whole) are simply gonna get tired of the b.s. and send Blago on his way.

At least, I hope as much. 

Intelligence can’t hide the scandalous scars of corruption forever.

Don’t hate me ‘cuz I’m right.




  1. philliesredpinstripes

    I have to agree with you Jeff. That appointment of Burris was to give cover for mister corrupt, Blago, and it now seems to be working, after the Demos in the Senate have kept on saying that they would reject him. Now they seem to be saying, okay, on second thought we’ll let him in, since The one’ says its okay to let him in. Geeze, whatever happened to principles?

  2. juliasrants

    As if the political process isn’t corrupt enough, the thought that the Democrats in Washington are actually thinking seating Burris is CRAZY! Is the issue that they are afraid if they don’t seat him the next appointee might be a republican? Makes you wonder about all of US could elect idiots like THAT to go to Washington. God help us all!


  3. Jane Heller

    I’ve TRIED to follow this story (Burris, not the Cardinals) on the news every night, but it keeps getting weirder and weirder. One day the Senate wants nothing to do with the guy. The next day they’re welcoming him with open arms. Makes the wacky world of baseball look positively sane.

  4. Erin Kathleen


    Maybe you should revive Fire Joe Morgan and call it Fire John Mozeliak. You might actually get your wish!

    And at least you know who your senator will be. It’s won’t get settled here in Minnesota until the next election, what with all of the forthcoming lawsuits.

  5. redstatebluestate

    Ha! Good call, Erin. There’s also a wave here in Chicago called “Fire the Hawk” (Ken “the Hawk” Harrelson, White Sox broadcaster). We tried it with Bush and that didn’t work so my hopes aren’t high at this point. I feel sorry for Minnesota taxpayers though. What a mess.

  6. redbirdchatter

    The best we can hope for this year is that our veteran players stay healthy and our “kids” have a break out year. Or, wait…was that last year?

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