Organ Grinding in Milwaukee

Organ_grinder_with_monkey.jpgIt’s official. Rod Blagojevich has been impeached. Now, you didn’t have to be a rocket scientist to see this coming but it’s funny that one month ago Blago was just another unremarkable midwestern governor and now he’s ready to join the pantheon of famous American pols hoisted by their own petard.

Don’t get me wrong, Blagojevich is no Nixon. He’s smarmy and well-coiffed but his f-bombs and attempted sale of a senate seat hardly compare to Nixon’s Machiavellian machinations which served to undermine America’s trust in its own government for a generation. Nor is the soon-to-be former governor an Andrew Johnson, consistently ranked as one of the worst presidents in history. He really can’t even stand up with the impeached but unconvicted and unsinkable Bill Clinton whose only real crime was his poor taste in women.

However, if Rod can be dispatched of for the mere suggestion of impropriety, this gives me hope. Perhaps we can apply the same standard to the current leader of Major League Baseball, Bud Selig, and hope he suffers a similar fate. To be fair, I’ll grant you that during his tenure baseball has seen both the best and worst of times. Owners are making money hand over fist and ticket sales are through the roof. But ordinary fans can no longer afford to buy those tickets. The lack of a salary cap has allowed teams to spend money like a bunch of drunken sailors (a crime that even my Tigers are guilty of and that Jeff wishes his Cards were capable of) and the strike in 1994 almost killed baseball. As if that weren’t enough, Selig’s chattering and dancing during the steroid era would make an organ grinder’s monkey blush.

The sad fact of the matter, though, is that Selig, just like Blagojevich, has committed no crime punishable by law and will probably get away with the unholiness he has perpetrated against unwitting baseball fans everywhere. The best we can hope for at this point is that he pulls an Eliot Spitzer and is forced to resign. Or maybe one of those sausages will go crazy during the cold Milwaukee winter and beat him senseless with a strip of styrofoam mustard. It could happen.




  1. mlb33333

    I don’t get that Blagojevich hasn’t committed a crime. Surely there’s such a thing as conspiracy to commit an illegal act? I mean if the FBI found some terrorists plotting to blow up the White House they wouldn’t have to wait for them to do it before they were arrested would they?

  2. redstatebluestate

    Yes, Russell, they would, which is why US America is such a special place (wink, wink). In fact, the man who killed the Jennifer Hudson family was previously arrested for — guess what??? — attempted murder. Gotta love this country. I think what Al is saying is that given Blago’s slipperiness (plus his high powered slick talkin’ law team) it’s still going to be pretty difficult to nail him outright.

  3. Elizabeth D.

    I didn’t hear “Blago” got impeached, glad this blog is bringing me the news! I’ll have to watch the Colbert Report and Daily Show later tonight to catch myself up.
    You’re absolutely right about baseball seeing the best of times and the worst of times (sorry no Tale of Two Cities). I watched the 1995 baseball special and I was only one when the baseball strike happened, but when my dad was telling me the stories, it was unbelievable! The whole salary cap thing is very interesting, I’m trying to decide what I think about it. Also, it seems like the whole steroids problem increased a lot.

  4. mlb33333


    “Conspiracy has been defined in the US as an agreement of two or more people to commit a crime, or to accomplish a legal end through illegal actions.”-

    that’s from Wikipedia and is therefore definitely true.I also put it you that Alan actually said;

    “The sad fact of the matter, though, is that Selig, just like Blagojevich, has committed no crime punishable by law”.

    The prosecution rests and will be calling for the death penalty (for Blagojevich or Alan, either one will do).

  5. juliasrants

    Now, now Allen. Let’s not get ahead of ourselves. While the House has voted to impeach Blago, the Senate will have to try him. (I stayed awake during American History class!) But I doubt that this trial will be as exciting as Bill’s. After all – conspiracy to sell a senate seat is not as exciting as “he did WHAT with a cigar”. What a sad day in American politics.


  6. flairforthedramatic

    America is indeed a ‘special place’.. possibly the only place in the world where the porn industry would dare to ask for a bailout, claiming the recession has “acted like a national cold shower” and say that “it’s time for Congress to rejuvenate the sexual appetite of America”… LOL
    With all the news of corruption in government and economic stress this past year, I still gotta say… some of it is pretty hilarious.
    V –

  7. dmathers

    If Selig was to be impeached, it should be for bilking tax-payers out of millions of dollars to build baseball stadiums. Its disgusting that an industry that rakes in billions upon billions of dollars every year continues to take money from our pockets — let alone our schools.

    To me a salary cap isn’t the issue. Let the players earn what they deserve. But increase the revenue sharing and penalize owners that use the revenue sharing to pad their own pockets.

    My humble opinions, anyway.


  8. Jane Heller

    I guess I’ll be Bud Selig’s apologist. Not because I think he’s a great commissioner. He totally blew it on the steroids issue. And some of his other calls have been ridiculous. But when I think back to other commissioners (Bowie Kuhn? Hello?) he’s not that bad. No one will ever be Bart Giamatti, who loved the game AND was brilliant. But Selig was always an “owner’s commissioner.” We knew that. He still owns the Brewers. Not exactly an impartial leader.

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