One Down, 29 More Blown Saves to Go…

jason motte.jpg…and that’s only if the 2009 lackluster beer-league softball team of a Cardinals bullpen wants to equal last year’s pathetic mark.

And let me tell ya, folks, they’re well on their way.

For if Opening Day is any indication as to what we Cardinal fans can expect this season, we are in for a long, painful, vomit-inducing ride.

In fact, I’m still cleaning up the mess I made yesterday.

Thank you, Jason Motte.

But more thanks to you, John Mozeliak, our miserly GM who spent the entire off-season ignoring the Cardinals’ biggest problem: the gaudy, bloody mess of a metastasizing bullpen.

Sure, having a healthy, strong, productive Adam Wainwright and Chris Carpenter in the rotation is great and all.  And yes, we will take a lot of leads into the sixth inning; but unless we find a way to get Albert Pujols on the bump for the 7th, 8th and 9th, we are in line to fall apart every single night like Amy Winehouse at an open bar mixer.

puking-pumpkin.jpgIn both cases, the result will be the same: lots and lots of puking.

And though I am impressed with Jason Motte’s blazing fastball, it’s not really all that impressive when that’s all he throws (that slider that doesn’t slide doesn’t count).  I’m sure Jack Wilson was thinking the same thing when he sat back and ripped that game-winner.

Dear readers, if running a baseball organization was a democracy, the revolution would have long been over by now; and the ominous, towering, domineering statue of John Mozeliak would be lying in ruins.

Don’t hate me ‘cuz I’m right.

Peace,

Jeffy

34 comments

  1. tim.davis5@us.army.mil

    That hurt and is probably a sign of things to come. That just further infuriates me to the point of kicking our GM right between the legs for his lack of urgency towards a closer in this year’s off-season / free agency period.

  2. redstatebluestate

    Julia — It’s already begun. I could use a northeastern lookout ready to make a midnight ride. You interested?
    Jane — I’d rather have no material and a winner on the field– wait, no, what am I saying? You’re right. I’ll get what I can out of this.
    –Jeff

  3. popejonash

    Never mind ‘democracy’. If the Cards’ bullpen was a horse, it would have been put down immediately after Wilson trotted around to second. Ashhttp://ashleymarshall.mlblogs.com

  4. raysrenegade

    I loved the way this guy pitched during Spring Training. He almost had a Rick “Wild Thing” Vaughn feel to him. He will get it together.
    Last night was an excellent reality check for him. I still will keep him on my Fantasy team because I know it sometimes takes a rookie closer a few games to feel that they are safe with their job.

    hopefully I am right here, because you do not want Trever Miller closing games. He is a lefty specialist, and that is it.

    Rays Renegade

    http://raysrenegade.mlblogs.com

  5. redstatebluestate

    RR — I hope you’re right, man. I don’t want Miller on the team period. But I’m not so sure about Motte. The man has one pitch. That’s it. They said he worked on a slider but it didn’t look very effective yesterday. How can someone be a closer with just one pitch that everyone’s sitting on? I mean, if he had Maddux-like location, then sure, but he doesn’t… like you said, he’s wild. Frustration is the new face of the Cardinals.
    –Jeff

  6. redstatebluestate

    Eatsleep — Did you enjoy last night’s romp too? 🙂
    Toby — Very possible. Very, very possible. Sad thing is: He ain’t much better.
    Ron — Right, so why doesn’t the front office address this?
    Jen — Mental stability goes out the window once the season starts.
    Erin — No thanks. Twinkies had nice walk-off last night though. Make you smile?
    William — They have seven fans?
    Jason — Patience my young paduwan. Patience.
    V — I was cheering madly, alone, in my apartment. AP is the man.
    Tom — AP not only hit a jack, but he reached second on a routine pop up that LaRoche dropped. Gamer indeed.
    Aaron — We’ll take Wood if you don’t want him.
    –Jeff

  7. jonnnnnn

    No, in fact I did not enjoy yesterday’s game. Thankfully it wasn’t on TV for me to watch and blacked out on MLB.TV so I didn’t have to witness the patheticness that is Ian Snell. Anyways, I have no idea what is up with Andy LaRoche. We all knew he was never going to be a gold glover or even one of the league’s better third basemen, but this is getting ridiculous. You can’t have 3 errors in 2 games… if he keeps this up he’s going to find the BENCH, and possibly a demotion in favor of our best defensive third baseman, Neil Walker.

    http://eatsleepmlb.mlblogs.com

  8. jonnnnnn

    No, in fact I did not enjoy yesterday’s game. Thankfully it wasn’t on TV for me to watch and blacked out on MLB.TV so I didn’t have to witness the patheticness that is Ian Snell. Anyways, I have no idea what is up with Andy LaRoche. We all knew he was never going to be a gold glover or even one of the league’s better third basemen, but this is getting ridiculous. You can’t have 3 errors in 2 games… if he keeps this up he’s going to find the BENCH, and possibly a demotion in favor of our best defensive third baseman, Neil Walker.

    http://eatsleepmlb.mlblogs.com

  9. tobymergler

    Hey Jeff

    Thanks for visiting my blog and leaving a comment. To answer your question, I don’t think it’s too early to bury Cliff Lee, and it has more to do with last year then this year. Someone else already posted a bunch of numbers under your comment to answer your question and rather than repeat them, I’ll just add that his BABIP and Strand rates screamed “lucky” last year and warned a serious regression was coming. Now those that took head of the warning and drafted Lee as their 3rd starter may be ok. But if you drafted him as your ace, well…..
    I actually hope Lee comes around, just because I like seeing good pitching exist in the league and he was great last year. But I’m not holding out hope.

    Thanks again.
    – Toby
    http://welcometotheshow.mlblogs.com/

  10. tobymergler

    My apologies, I meant to say his Flyball rate, not his BABIP. 1. I had the wrong player in mind. 2. I’m an idiot.
    – Toby

  11. nwest33

    Already getting down on Motte? Look at CC, Lincecum, Lyon, and other pitchers that are pretty decent, but blew on opening day. I see your point since last season the Cards struggled to find a safe closer after Izzy went down. Give him a few more games, at least I am, he’s on my fantasy team ;).

  12. redstatebluestate

    Eatsleep — At this rate, Walker looks like he could be a Gold Glove winner compared to LaRoche (ahem, I mean, LaChoke)
    Toby — No prob. Hey, Allen and I are a bunch of idiots, so you’ll fit right in! Thx for the info on Lee. I wasn’t too sure of him so I avoided him in the drafts.
    nwest33 — Yes. Already getting down. And yes, it’s because of last year. I’ll give him a few more games… but that’s it.
    –Jeff

  13. redstatebluestate

    Shelley — Haha. Yes. I ripped it off of someone else anyway. Maybe the Nats should use that as their new logo. It was more of the same today against the Fins. Yikes!
    –Jeff

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