Texting Sacrilege

texting.jpgThe following is an actual, real life conversation (albeit by text messaging) that occurred last night between myself and a fellow baseball nerd (who just so happens to be a lowly Cub fan) prior to the Cardinals/Dodgers game on ESPN — America’s home for Manny-mania and other sensationalized crap.

HIM:  Whew!  First place finally.  I feel so safe.  Especially since we can pull off a deal at the break cuz I’m sure hendry has the green light financially……..

ME:   Yeah, sure.  Don’t get too comfortable 🙂

HIM:  I was being facetious of course.  And anti jinxing at the same time.   Have fun with manny and the boyz tonite.

ME:   Haha.  I know.  I’m fluent in sarcasm.  Will do.  Fertility drugs in hand. 

HIM:  How would Cards nation handle the inevitable Pujols scandal?

ME:   Suicide.

HIM:  Seriously.

ME:   Okay…seriously… Denial.  Then anger.  Then revolt.  Then suicide.

HIM:  About what I imagine would happen in the bronx wit DJ.  Laughing villainous now.  When that happens I’ll put on robin williams beard and tell u its not your fault.

ME:   Haha.  Might b too late.  I may have murdered an entire village by then.

HIM:  Like Annakin when he took out the sand people?

ME:  Yes.  Only worse.

And that is all I have to say about that.

Hate me ‘cuz I preach the Truth: that Jesus hates the Cubs; just don’t hate me ‘cuz I’m right.

Peace,

Jeff

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22 comments

  1. ccrbirdbrained

    It absolutely kills those North Siders to think that Albert Pujols is this good legitimately.

    I just posted about the Alphonso Soriano antics from last night; I’d love your take and some updates on what they think of him up there.

    Chris
    http://bird-brained.mlblogs.com

  2. redstatebluestate

    Chris — They won’t shut up about it. Must be awful to be a loser AND jaded. Jeesh. If I see Sori on Lake Shore I’ll run him off the road.
    Jonestein — OMG. Thx!
    –Jeff

  3. southernbelle

    Wow! You guys are so funny! I really like your blog. Jeff, I love dogs & puppies, too! And I’ve been playing piano since 1st grade, Mozart included! I love Albert Pujols, a true class act. I have his rookie card! The Tigers are in a tight race. My Yankees handled them pretty well, with the sweep and all. Although mine is a Yankee blog, I welcome everyone, and was wondering if you guys would be interested in it. If you get the chance to see it, that would be great! Thank you, and best of luck to both teams! -from Virginia
    http://southernbelle.mlblogs.com

  4. zelig888

    Moneyball — Thanks! Send the link to everyone you know! *Cap tip.
    Devilabrit — Consider it dug. It still hurts.
    Julia — Yep, like Bird Brained said, those Cub fans are so salty that someone could do it the right way.
    Virginia — Thanks for stopping by! Glad we have some things in common. We’ll check out your site. Keep comin’ back!
    –Jeff

  5. crazy19canuck

    Jeff – Don’t look now, but Kaz just completed 7 innings and picthed to the first batter in the 8th…That’s 3 games now that the old Scotty is starting to show. 🙂
    Just thought I’d let ya know! 😉
    Ginny

  6. zelig888

    Yeah, I saw that, Ginny; but his track record this year tells another story. I think he’s lost that starter step. Time to conserve and do a Dennis Eckersley type transition into closer role.
    –Jeff

  7. southernbelle

    Hey guys! Thanks for visiting my site. I’ll keep working hard like you told me too. My Yanks had a bad loss last night. I hope they play better today. I saw you guys are interested in baseball books. I read one a long time ago called, “Me and My Dad.” It’s Paul O’ Neil’s book. It was really good. There are so many good baseball books out there! Thanks for supporting me, guys! -from Virginia
    http://southernbelle.mlblogs.com

  8. redstatebluestate

    Lori — Zing! That’s a good one, never thought of that… and yes, I’m pretty pleased with the home stand so far.
    Heartruss — Once you come in, you never get out.
    –Jeff

  9. redstatebluestate

    Virginia — No prob… and yes, reading is good… unless it’s something authored by Ann Coulter… I can’t keep food down while reading that kind of stuff.
    –Jeff

  10. Jane Heller

    You are truly kings of all media. First videos. Then text messages. What’s next? Your Tweets? And what ever happened between you and Erin? I know you weren’t her hotel room stalker, because you had an alibi. You were here blogging, right? Right???

    http://janeheller.mlblogs.com

  11. redstatebluestate

    Jane — I am the Michael Jackson of technocracy, yes (just not as weird)… and yeah, I got the shaft from Erin and her handlers. I couldn’t even get nearer than 50 feet. I let it go. After the scandalous vid broke I wanted no association with it whatsoever. Yes, my alibi was Morgan Street after the games, with a pint in my hand 😉
    –Jeff

  12. devilabrit

    so since you are the god of technology(he says choking back the laughs) and knowledgeable in aspects related too…(does that even make sense) shoud we refer to Philadelphia now as the Phillies or PhilLEEs….
    this has nothing to do with the technology stuff or texting but had to find a segway somewhere
    Outside the Phillies Looking In
    http://devilabrit.mlblogs.com

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