Illusionary Tactics

illusion.jpgYesterday, my unequivocally nefarious and visually challenged colleague, Mr. Krause, finally posted his two-month late debt which required him to pose for the camera while proudly donning St. Louis Cardinals merchandise accentuated by a bright, broad smile across his face.  Obviously, there is little doubt as to how disingenuous the smile was; but I must admit that even I was shocked at just how low Mr. Krause stooped to eschew what would be considered by everyone else in the world to be a rightly just punishment.

Here is the picture:

allen_cards_bet.JPGSure.  On the surface, everything seems in order… until we zoom in a little closer (thanks for the assist, Jonestein):

Allen in hat close up.jpgHmm.  Is that a photocopy of the regal S-T-L taped on your cap, Al?  And what is that underneath the pasted cover-up?  Is… is that… is that a Washington Nationals cap!?!?!?! (click *here* for reference to that same Natinals cap)

*Rich white people in the suburbs of Detroit whail in painful disgust.

Congratulations, Al, on not only embarrassing me and Cardinals fans worldwide, but for also abandoning your own people during a playoff race.  Nice.  Indeed, you are the Sarah Palin of baseball fandom!

But Allen’s experiment with the not-so-magical isn’t the only thing causing the masses to rub their eyes today.  Note to all Major League managers not named Tony LaRussa: If Albert Pujols steps in with the bases loaded, for Lord’s sake walk the man!  Last night, Jerry Manuel found out rather quickly what everyone else seems to already know when he decided to have Sean Green pitch to Albert, only to see Pujols launch yet another grand slam, which ultimately led the Cardinals to victory.  For the record, in 2009, Albert is a disgustingly sick 7-9 with the bases loaded, including five (YES, FIVE!) grand slams.  If you think you’ll get A.P. to swing at something stupid in that situation then you deserve to be beaten.

And while we’re on the subject of idiocy…

obama joker.jpgThis photo has been dancing around the interwebs faster than Kevin Gregg can blow a 9th inning lead; but let me tell ya, just like Al’s photo above, this is all wrong.  I’m not talking about the actual lampooning of our president as a joker — that’s all fair game as far as I’m concerned — what bothers me is that the word “SOCIALISM” appears below the Obama-as-Heath-Ledger-as-the-Joker image.

Come on now.  Socialism?  Look, the Joker was an anarchist.  There was nothing social about the Joker at all.  The closest he ever came to socialism was wanting to kill everyone for no reason other than to just kill everyone.  So if you’re gonna roast the Prez then at least make sure you get your metaphors — visual and contextual — correct.

“Fool me once… shame on… shame on you.  Y’fool me y’can’t get fooled again.”

Don’t hate me ‘cuz I’m right.

Peace,

Jeff

31 comments

  1. popejonash

    Haha that’s sweet. At the ejnd of the season you should hand out a whole bunch of Sarah Palin awards. Just imagine, ‘The Sarah Palin award for youth work goes to…Tony Bernazard.”The Sarah Palin award for mediocrity goes to Jason Giambi.’ The possibilities are endless.Ashhttp://ashleymarshall.mblogs.com

  2. redstatebluestate

    Kylie — Not sure where it’s from. I had it on my computer saved from a long time ago. And yeah, the Natinals? Please. Al is so weird sometimes.
    Cat — No prob! Hope it was a good one!
    –Jeff

  3. ibleedpinstripes

    Tsk, tsk, tsk. Oh Al, when are you gonna learn? LOL. Looking at that picture now, it’s painfully obvious that that’s a black and white photocopy. It’s also painfully obvious that we’re all blind for not noticing it in the first place. Fail.

    And touche on the Obama/Joker thing. Jeff – 1, right-wing America – 0.

    – Lisa
    http://perennialpinstriper.mlblogs.com/

  4. redstatebluestate

    Ash — Good idea. I have a feeling Allen would win his fair share of them 😉
    Julia — Thanks! Didn’t even know but we’ll take it!
    Lisa — Nothing makes me happier than beating — I mean, defeating Right-Wing America and their she-devil, Ann Coulter.
    –Jeff

  5. redstatebluestate

    TC — Lots and lots of them these days, eh? Like Cleveland as a contender in 2010…Haha.
    –Jeff

  6. redstatebluestate

    Jonestein SCORE! Unbelievable! You’ve got some REAL talent there, pal! I LOVE IT! Thanks!
    –Jeff

  7. redstatebluestate

    Metmainman — Besides being the Sarah Palin of baseball fandom, Allen is also Captain Obvious.
    –Jeff

  8. devilabrit

    I’m confused, (not hard to do I know) but is Al collecting hats from teams that suck!.. although I guess it’s not an isult covering the Nats logo, just putting a Cards one on a Nats hat….your right on the joker thing….you need more severe punsihment for Al, he doesn’t seem to be taking it seriously….
    ~peter
    http://devilabrit.mlblogs.com

  9. redstatebluestate

    Pittpeas — Did you say “smile” or “simlie”? LOL. Looks SIMILAR. 🙂
    Emily — Yep. He was born with it.
    Peter — Yeah, Al is a pseudo-politician you know… it’s in his blood to flip-flop loyalties depending on the situation.
    –Jeff

  10. redstatebluestate

    Ginny — Thanks… Al… well, he’s been a resident of DC for some time now. That has to be part of it… still, it’s no excuse.
    –Jeff

  11. redstatebluestate

    Dillon — I try… I mean, I just had it for some reason. Got it off the internet somewhere a while ago.
    –Jeff

  12. indianslove

    Justin is doing well for us, so I’m glad about that. Plus all the guys we brought up because of these trades have done very well, especially the hitter, Trevor Crowe. It’s actually not looking to bad. Hahaa! The midges would love that, I bet. Congrats on being #2 on the standings!!
    http://tribechick.mlblogs.com/ -TC

  13. raysrenegade

    OMG, soon we will have dog and cat living together………mass hysteria in the Motor City.
    Maybe it is time for a real “robocop”, and his firsat duty can be to find Alan and take him out…………just kidding…maybe.
    The “Sarah Palin” line was a instant classic.
    And congrats on the two-fer standing in the Latest Leaders list.
    Being neck and neck like that the past year just shows you how good we have gotten. Be glad you are not down in 13th where the water is always cold and the women too.

    Rays Renegade

    http://raysrenegade.mlblogs.com

  14. redstatebluestate

    RR — Sometimes all ya want is a cold one. Been there, done that 😉
    Johnny — Indeed. Much can change in just one week. Tough to keep up!
    –Jeff

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s