Party’s Over

Put your clothes back on.  Cap off that fifth of Jack.  Call yourself a cab.

The San Francisco Giants’ perpetual playoff philandering is as done as Sarah Palin’s political career.

It is sunk.

And just in case you need proof, here it is, written all over Nate Schierholtz’s face:

san francisco giants lose.jpgOh sure, we can sit around and discuss how their dominating pitching staff could possibly get them over the Rockies hump and into the wild card spot if only the offense could score runs.  We could ruminate on the occasional power surges put forth by Pablo Sandoval and Bengie Molina.  Indeed, we could waste a lot of time talking about the Giants in general.

But the point is this: Good pitching may beat good hitting but if ya don’t score any runs you can’t win a damn thing.

And that’s why the Giants should be thinking about what kind of offense they are going to bring in during the offseason for 2010 and let the 2009 playoff dreams slip back down to reality.

Like most parties, it sure was fun while it lasted; but in the end you wake up and find the girl next to you isn’t quite the supermodel you thought she was — that those aren’t freckles on her face, those are… er… sores that you couldn’t see during your drunken stupor of endemic idiocy the night before.


Or, you just get all excited about your big party and end up in the burn unit like this guy:

It happens.  Parties end.  Occasionally your hair will catch on fire. 

Deal with it.

Don’t hate me ‘cuz I’m right.

Happy Friday!


(Schierholtz Photo by Ezra Shaw/Getty Images)



  1. Jonestein

    As with the speech-impaired Ellis Lanksder of the now infamous “like umm” vid, I know I’m not supposed to be laughing at the unfortunate ******* in this bit of pyro-hilarity, but my cube-encased collegues are indeed wondering WTF I’m over here snickering about.
    Thank you, RSBS, for helping me become an even more reprehensible human.

  2. Jonestein

    …and why the he1l did Mlblogs censor the word sch_muck in my last comment? Since when is that a naughty word?

  3. redstatebluestate

    Emma — Your Dodgers trump this year’s Giants. Same old story 🙂
    Jonestein — You’re welcome, mate! As for the sch_muck censor… who knows. You also can’t “wh00ped” without it getting censored. I’m assuming it’s bad sportsmanship to talk about “wh00ping” somebody? I don’t get it; but we (as always) will get AROUND it.

  4. Buz

    Yep. Even if the Rockies limped home at 9-6.. the Giants would have to be lights out… playing at .750 clip or so. I just can’t see. Especially since the poor dregs are in Chavez Ravine for 3 of those. Turn out the Lights! The Party’s over! I sure used to love Don Meredith singing that line on MNF. Oh.. showing my age there. : )

    Buz –

  5. TribeTed

    Great post, by any chance was the guy who got burned in the video Allen? 😉 Love the line: “The San Francisco Giants’ perpetual playoff philandering is as done as Sarah Palin’s political career.” hilarious!! You really outdid yourself here Jeff. Keep the hilarious comments coming!!

    Ted –

  6. Erin Kathleen

    Geez, Jeff. As soon as you said that, the Giants scored 8 runs against the Dodgers, while the Rockies lost to the D-Backs and now hold a mere 2.5 game lead over San Francisco. Can you please write something about how wonderful the Tigers are, and how the Twins have absolutely no chance at catching them? 🙂

  7. redstatebluestate

    IBDB — Doesn’t sound like a good proposition either way.
    Buz — Don’t worry. When your white hairs multiply overnight like they do on me, I find solace in knowing I’m not the only one getting older. LOL.
    Ted — Thanks. I try to say the word “philander” at least once each day in a new conversation. (that’s a lie).
    Julia — Haha. Never read the labels myself. No fun!
    09indians — Agreed. But it ain’t good enough on its own.
    Erin — I’ll do what I can!

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