Rick Ankiel: This Man Cannot Be Serious

rick ankiel royals.jpgIf I were stranded on a remote island ten years ago and I just now got back to see Rick Ankiel is playing center field for the Kansas City Royals, I would be thoroughly confused.  We all know what a tremendous story Rick Ankiel’s career has been up to this point.  So let me be clear: as a Cardinals fan, I fully support Ricky and thank him for all he did in a Cards uniform.  I wish him the best of luck.

Yet I cannot help but believe all those concussions did a smidgen more than some serious damage to his psyche.

In his welcoming press conference with the Royals last week, Ankiel mentioned that part of why he wanted to come to Kansas City was because he ‘liked the direction’ the team was going.

That’s horse$hit.

And we all know it.

The truth is: Rick Ankiel is happy to be with the Royals because he has a job now when it looked like he might not.  I can’t blame the guy.  I would do the exact same thing… which may or may not include my liking ‘the direction’ of the team.

Because, let’s face it: this team ain’t goin’ anywhere. 


Scott Podsednik.  Jason Kendall.  Billy Butler.  Kyle Farnsworth. 

These names do not a champion make.

I think the best summary of the Kansas Royals’ direction, under the keen eye of GM Dayton Moore, is represented by a technical glitch which provided wonderment during the press conference.

Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you the Kansas City Royals: Team of Infinite Regress:

kansas city royals infinite regress.JPGHate me ‘cuz I hurt feelings, just don’t hate me ‘cuz I’m right.



– – –

Tune in Monday and Tuesday of this week. Ninemen’s Morris is baaaaaaaaaaaaack…



  1. redstatebluestate

    Indians — Rick needs to eat. That’s what he’s doing. I totally get it.
    Cat — He’ll be fine there. I wish him luck. They just won’t be good. That’s all.
    Mimi — That is very true.
    Emma — I don’t mind that he wants a paycheck. Hell, that’s how they all are now. Rick is a real good guy.
    Greg — Yep. And I’ve said worse when I REALLY wanted something… like money.
    Joe — Excellent points. He wouldn’t even be able to live long enough to write about it!

  2. moonman78

    Love Rick, still will, just like I still love my mighty midget Eckstein, but…what in the wonderfull corn field covered heaven are you doing signing with the royals? Jesus? Maybe this season you’ll smash your head and wake up in a Buger King outside Eugene oregon schemin’ with the manager about building a meth lab on the roof! Because that scenario makes more sence then the bitter reality. The royals…my god…

  3. kcyeti

    The 2010 Royals will be the greatest team that ever played. They will sweep the Phillies in 4 to win the World Series. Rick Ankiel will be the WS MVP. U can borrow my time machine if u don’t believe me. Dayton Moore = Baseball Jedi

  4. redstatebluestate

    Matt — What? The Pirates DIDN’T take the bait? LOL.
    Moonman — That was definitely one of the best comments I’ve seen here in a while. Nice.
    Kcyeti — Somethin’ tells me I don’t want your time machine 🙂

  5. redstatebluestate

    Jane, yeah, I’m aware of that… in fact, that was my point: He’s happy just to have a job, will say whatever is the company line, even though it’s a complete farce 🙂

  6. xcicix

    I once got a mail-order form for a Rick Ankiel action figure with a pack of baseball cards. Wonder if it’s redeemable now he’s not a Cards’ pitching prospect?
    And speaking of pitching, he’d probably do a better job than Kyle Farnsworth or almost anyone else on that team, seeing as the Royals only have two pitchers that will ever be any good…

  7. bklyntrolleyblogger

    “I liked the direction the team was taking” Alex Rodriguez, as he backed up the van to pick up his $250 million from Tom Hicks.
    “I like the direction the team is headed” Carlos Beltran, upon signing with NYM, after asking the Yankees to sign him for less money the Mets were offering him.
    I’d be an even bigger fan if these guys were not heard from. If they never say anything ever again, we still have the game.

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