Buster Olney? More Like Busted Phony

fire buster olney.jpgBelieve me, dear readers, I didn’t want go here today… I didn’t want to appear like I was lending credence to another crackpot theory by actually addressing said crackpot theory.  But the internets are a buzzin’ and the pressure from RSBS fans to address the situation is too great. 

So, consider this sharp tongue released…

Yesterday, I first learned of ESPN shoe-licking savant Buster Olney’s egregious aspiration to be donned the worldwide leader of make-believe (specifically, a fantasyland where the Cardinals and Phillies swap Albert Pujols for Ryan Howard) by reading the Prince of New York’s take.

He speaks for me.

And he is right.

Why does Buster Olney have a job?

Seriously, this is no joking matter — especially considering the faux affection thrown Olney’s way every time he enters a baseball conversation, whether on t.v., radio or print.

Indeed, Olney’s actions are akin to me walking into an evangelical church yelling “the rapture’s coming, the rapture’s coming, the rapture’s coming!” just because I think it’d be funny to see how people react.  (PS, the rapture is not coming… because it’s ludicrous.)

It is akin to a doctor telling a perfectly healthy pregnant woman that her baby is dead — even though it isn’t — just to get an interesting conversation going… y’know, a good old conversation about what it’d be like if her baby were dead.

It’s blasphemy.  It’s conjecture.  It’s unfounded (even though he says it isn’t).

Not even Carlos Zambrano would say something that stupid. (*I reserve the right to change my mind about this one*)

For me, the desire to continue down this ranting road is strong… but I leave it to my man-crush, Albert the Machine himself, to quash this unfettered anger by saying:

“There’s people, stupid, that like to write something when it’s not the
truth, and that’s all I have to say about that.”

Dagnabbin’ right, A.P.

Buster?  Eat a big Phillie phat one.

And don’t hate me… ‘cuz I’m right.

Peace,

Jeff

(*Link to article with Albert’s quote*)

16 comments

  3. xcicix

    Trade Pujols? That’s the stupidest thing I ever heard. Okay, you can trade Cliff Lee because you can’t afford him, Ryan Howard, Roy Halladay, et al. But trade your franchise player, who’s the best in baseball, for a guy who’s like a better version of Curtis Granderson and plays first base because you gave Matt Holliday and Scott Boras too much money? The Cardinals would be total idiots. I am not sure how one would believe a rumor like that, to tell the truth.

    Reply
  4. bklyntrolleyblogger

    I love it when these Sports Charlatans get way too full of themselves and sabotage their careers in the blink of an eye. Remeber how Jim Grey ambushed Pete Rose and then disappeared from existence? Yea, watching the downfall of the stupid is fun. The great thing about Buster farting in his spacesuit like that is the lingering stench he’s left to inhale for offering up such a piece while we all hang around, point and laugh.
    BTB=Mike

    Reply
  7. redstatebluestate

    Cici — You said it. People wouldn’t have believed had it been someone else saying it, but it’s Buster. And ESPN.
    Mike — Excellent (and nauseating) analogy. Well done!
    TotalBases — I was more shocked than amused. Still, it’s fiction. That’s the main point.
    Emma — Haha! Surely he’ll say something even MORE crazy than what he has already.
    –Jeff

    Reply
  8. irishsoxkid19

    The Cards will never in their right minds trade Pujols!! As for people saying stupid and misleading things, it’s annoying!! It’s like the Penguin who knocked out Savard in the NHL game a few weeks ago and NHL didn’t suspend him for it. People who say stupid things, are stupid.
    -Holly
    http://irishsoxkid19.mlblogs.com

    Reply
  10. redstatebluestate

    Holly — I’m with ya… except, who still watches hockey? lol
    23gonzalez — They won’t. Believe that!
    –Jeff

    Reply
  11. raysrenegade

    Funny these writers now have columns that are called “blogs” but they get more credibility than us on steroids… their blogs, not the writers….They are still the skinny kids that got picked last ( most of them).
    A great example of today’s media centerpiece was the last day of July in 2009 when media giants posted Twitters and blog posting about Scott Kazmir, then pulled them ( including MLB.com) within minutes of their issue.
    Bloggers have tried for years to get credibility while these guys get their via their abbreviated initials (EPSN, SI).
    I am not aying I am better than them, but I know I can stack my credibility against them and win every time.
    Viva la revolution!

    Rays Renegade

    http://raysrenegade.mlblogs.com

    Reply
  14. devilabrit

    HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHA… maybe I have finally stopped laughing…. I think Olney was had here… wouldn’t that be funny… setting up sports media to take a hit, especially when they have a less than savory relationship with a team or certain players…..

    ~peter
    Outside the Phillies Looking In
    http://devilabrit.mlblogs.com

    Reply

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