RSBS Presents: Black Holes

black-hole-galaxy.jpgOne of the most peculiar realms of science is understanding what exactly goes on inside of a black hole (and no, folks, we ain’t talkin’ about the vile emitting from Milton Bradley’s mouth).  Widely understood as a “deformation of spacetime caused by a very compact mass” — an area from which nothing can escape the immense gravitational pull of its centerblack holes are like the underground club scene of the cosmos: all kinds of weird s*** can happen… and does!

To me, the most interesting aspect of a black hole lies at its very center, past the event horizon, down the rabbit hole, settling on an infinitesimal point known as the singularity.  If you were unfortunate enough to be sucked into a black hole and lucky enough to survive the trip down its core, by the time you reached the singularity you would surely be a shredded mess, the result of being filleted by the strongest forces theorized by the human mind.

But boy would it be an exciting death!

The oddest thing about the singularity is that once we start working in and around that point, we realize that the laws of physics become completely erroneous and unnecessary.  That’s right, dear readers, when you get to the singularity, Einstein’s theory of general relativity makes no sense at all.

And while black holes and their singularities may be intangible to us from our terrestrial vantage point, if you look around you today you will see all sorts of things that could cause one to think we may be close to such a singularity — a place where what we see is so shocking, so odd, so perplexing that it just doesn’t make sense…

The Good Guys Win: Joe Mauer
Twins fans were so afraid they would lose their hometown hero to the evil chops of the Yankees and the Yankees 2.0 that doomsday scenarios and flat-out decrees of apostasy had already been accepted as fact.  But in the end, the Twins had to sign Joe — for the sake of their new stadium and for the sake of their fans.  And they did, for a very reasonable price.  Oh, and by the way, the Twins are not a small-market team, so this situation is getting even more black-holish by the minute!

nancy.pelosi.jpgLiberal US Americans Actually Accomplish Something
After eight long years of maddening sound bytes, phantom wars against phantom enemies for phantom purposes and an all-out assault on reason, the liberal majority in the House got together and passed a health care bill that might actually work.  Oh yeah, sure, not everyone is happy about it and the most concerning aspect is how we’re going to pay for it; but, in my opinion, the sheer fact that you won’t be financially punished for being sick anymore indicates a huge step forward.  And besides, since when do US Americans care about national debt?  Here, in the great state of Illinois, for as long as I can remember, the political machine has been borrowing money from the FUTURE to pay for current projects.  I hear that Illinois is rich in the future, so I’m gonna see if I can get in on that too.  I need a Lamborghini.

Exciting News Out of Cincinnati Reds Camp
You have to go back quite a few years to find anything worth anticipating from the Reds in March, but this year is different.  Under the wise hand of former Cardinal front office legend Walt Jocketty, Cincinnati signed Cuban defector Aroldis Chapman during the offseason, hoping he would live up to his international hype.  And boy does he!  Thought by many to be an ace-caliber pitcher going into this season, Reds fans have a whole lot to be excited about for a change… of course, that is… until Dusty Baker blows out his arm and ruins his career.


Hate me ‘cuz I test the limits of physics, just don’t hate me ‘cuz I’m right.




  1. joefromnewhampshire

    Volquez got his, so now Baker only has three young arms to punish; Homer Bailey, Cueto, and Chapman. Bailey may or may not pitch well enough to stay on the team. Chapman will not start the year with the club…Boy do I feel bad for Johnny Cueto.

  2. steve_t

    Hey Jeff,

    Just checking in after crawling out of my own offseason black hole. Ratcheting up the blog and looking forward to your posts. By the way, I’m pretty happy about Mauer staying in Minnesota for the next few years. But I’m afraid the Twins may find that contract crushing in the coming years, as the Yankees wait patiently.

    Steve T.

  3. mattpeas

    im not the biggest polictical buff, in fact it just irks me all together. but from a blind eye like mine this health care bill doesnt seem all that bad, good in fact. come 2014 im sure we all will be helathier and happier

  4. redstatebluestate

    Jane — LOL. I know. That pic made me laugh… that’s the only reason I used it, bad as it is.
    Steve — Nice to see ya back! We’ll be catchin up on the Sox Blog too. And, do you mean to say Posada isn’t gonna play forever?
    Matt — There’s a lot of muck involved… from both sides… and it’s not perfect, but it’s the 21st century and we’re behind when it comes to universal coverage IMO. So I feel we’re moving in the right direction at least.

  5. Jonestein

    Ah yes, the fiscally liberal mind – compassionate and “liberal”…with other people’s hard earned money. Oh well, at least Jeff is one step ahead of the rest of us…he speaks Chinese so he’ll be able to suck-up quicker to our soon-to-be Chinese overlords.

  6. redstatebluestate

    Haha! Well, Jonestein, the Chinese are socially inferior to U.S. America in a lot of ways, but they do take care of their own sick people, so I gotta tip my hat. And since the government is going to spend my money and your money and other peoples’ money ANYWAY, it might as well be for a good cause. I’d much rather it go to being able to keep my fingers and toes than to fund a two full-scale wars we cannot possibly win among other myriad government projects that are going nowhere… like, er… the Patriot Act, and “such as, the Iraq. Cuz they don’t have maps.”

  7. Jonestein

    So selling us out to the insurance companies is a “good cause”? ROFLMAO! Did you even read this effing bill? And this “gonna spend our money anyway” mentality? Weak. Do you honestly think it’s an either/or situation?

    Here’s a novel idea: how ’bout we elect people that are genuinely interested in scaling back ALL federal spending, which includes our little foreign adventures and ill-conceived social programs? (If you are assuming I support the redistribution of other people’s money to military contractors, the Constitution shredding “Patriot” Act, and that scam that is, like, The Iraq, then you are sadly mistaken.)

    And with healthcare, how about electing people who are interested in addressing root causes, you know, the piles of legislation/regulation already on the books that got us to where we are today, instead of piling on more legislation to fix what they broke in the first place?

    Or how ’bout this: Albert Pujols sucks!
    (Nothing like a little ad hom-by-proxy to stroke the ol’ spleen)

  8. redstatebluestate

    Jonestein, AP does not suck and you know it 🙂 Now, as for the political candidate you described, well, I don’t think such a thing actually exists. Right? At least, I don’t recall ever having the option to vote for someone of that caliber. Like my mama always said: deal with what ya got and try to make it better. I’m dealing… wanna run for office to make it better? I’d vote for ya. The bottom line for most people doesn’t involve all the backroom stuff, it involves getting health care when one needs it.

  9. Jonestein

    Wrong. The Libertarian Party is chock full of exactly that type of candidate. If people would free themselves from the shackles of “wasted vote” syndrome and voting for the “lesser of two evils” (as well as the misinformation spread about libertarian ideas), we’d get these candidates in office and see some actual “change” instead of the never ending spending-spree ping-pong tournament being played by the two faction looters of Theater D.C..

    As for Pujols, he will only avoid suckitude if I am the lucky one that gets to nab him in our upcoming fantasy draft.

  10. redstatebluestate

    Gotcha. Well, I hope you get him too, so I can cheat you out of him with a slick trade ;-). As for the Libertarian candidates, I can name one, Ron Paul (but wasn’t he more of a Diet Republican?). In my district I’ve never seen one Libertarian candidate run for office. Let them be known! I don’t mind Libertarianism… I welcome it… but there needs to be more action and less talk about action, in my humble opinion.

  11. Jonestein

    Unfortunately, your definition of “action” appears to be more patchwork legislation to cure the ills caused by the last 30-40 years of patchwork legislation that screwed the healthcare pooch in the first place. This latest monstrosity of legislative ineptitude will do nothing but drive up insurance premiums for everyone. Don’t even get me started on the mandate that all citizens will be REQUIRED BY LAW to purchase insurance, whether they can afford it or not, AND the inevitable new layer of bureaucracy that will have to be created to ensure that we Proles purchase our Victory Insurance Policy.

    Ron Paul is about as libertarian as they come. “Republican-Lite” is just another misinformation meme.

    As for not finding candidates, you just aren’t looking very hard:

    …besides, the Republicrat written election codes in each state make it incredibly difficult for any non-Republicrat party to even get on the ballot…I’m betting Illinois election codes are as screwy as those in Texas.

    Anyhoo, I suppose we should take this off-line, as I’m sure RSBS Nation is beginning to tire of this thread.



  12. Jonestein

    Oops, I retract the not looking hard enough comment, we were talking Theater D.C., not Theater Illinois…my bad, was trying to blast in a post while rushing off to a meeting.

  13. redstatebluestate

    Fair enough. At the end of the day, I just don’t want to be punished for the randomness of getting sick … it’s personal. And like I told you before, it sucks. Thanks for the links. I’m interested. I just don’t know enough about the party to make an educated argument for or against right now.

  14. redstatebluestate

    Nah, Cat… I’m the same way. But our black hole state is almost over until November at least 🙂

  15. bklyntrolleyblogger

    – A roof? Mauer?…A roof? Mauer? *(buy stock in company making Twins/Mauer winter gear….shhh)
    – HealthCare Reform will never get this sick feeling I have in my stomach. I just hope the Mayans are right. You’re invited to my End of Days party by the way!
    – the BUTCHER, the BAKER, the pitching career UNDERTAKER.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s