The Road to Despair Goes from El DeBarge to Youppi

eldebarge jet.JPGStanding in the check-out line at my local grocer, I scanned the magazine rack hoping to find out if Khloe Kardashian had eaten herself to death or how drunk Jennifer Aniston got in Cabo while still thinking about Brad.  Instead, I was subjected to an image I thought I’d blocked out 25 years ago:

Eldra “El” DeBarge.

On the cover of Jet.

Who’s Johnny… she said…

*cue the daydream montage*

I see Bert Blyleven record his 3,000th strikeout…

I see Bob Horner hit four homeruns in one game…

I see Mike Scott no-hit the Giants… the Red Sox come back to win the ALCS after being down 3 games to 1… Ray Knight skip like a schoolgirl on Mookie Wilson’s Bill Buckner nutmeggin’ dribbler…

…and… and, I… I see…


*snaps out of it*

youppi_i.jpgOh, Youppi… oh, dear, dear Youppi… no!!!  It’s not FAIR!  It’s not fair that El DeBarge gets a comeback and you don’t… not fair that in 2010 you’re relegated to Montreal hockey duty while El DeBarge gets nominated for a Grammy.


And you wonder. 

You wonder why I don’t believe in god.

No loving god would subject the altruistic baseball fan to such chronic despair!!!

So hate me ‘cuz I I think El DeBarge topped out in ’86, just don’t hate me ‘cuz I’m right.




  1. raysrenegade

    Still wondering if someone re-fashioned Youppi’s old costume amd he reappeared somewhere within the minor league system of the Washington Nationals.
    He seemed like the slightly slower cousin of Slider, the Cleveland Indians spastic humor machine, but with some French Canadian inspired body language.
    Or maybe he is retired to the hustle and bustle of some exotic locale scaring the native children who have never seen such a orange hairy beats that did not wear black socks with their sandals.
    The word “Youppi” always sounded so cheery, enthusiastic and spirited.

    Rays Renegade

  2. philliesoutside

    El DeBarge must have been something only known to Americans of that era, cause i have no friggin idea who he is and based on the name wouldn’t want too….

    and now to respond to your comment about gloating: I think I have been penalized… I have migrated my blog to and have since been locked out by mlblogs… so I can not blog, so I am going to have to reopen my old blog just to gloat… so coming soon to my old blog my gloating.. stay tuned… LOL


  3. redstatebluestate

    Emma — I know! Dat boy can bang!
    RR — It will always sound cheery… we have to keep him alive, if only in our imaginations.
    Jane – Remember the movie Short Circuit? “Who’s Johnny…she said…”
    Sue – Signs point to yes…
    Prince – I don’t recall the Crazy Crab… so I doubt he could be better than the Quebecois.

  4. redstatebluestate

    Peter! They locked you out? How dare they!!! REVOLT! And kudos on the Lee stuff. I’m gonna go cry now.

  5. Michael David

    Jeff, I never miss a Steve Guttenburg movie, but I do miss Youppi. Maybe he could come to the U.P. and be our mascot..(Yooper..Youppi…hmmm). Now I have to go rent ‘The Last Dragon’, and listen to Rhythem of the Night…thanks…
    ‘Minoring In Baseball’

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