Three Up, Three Down

allen loves joe mauer.jpg
Just like Mr. Krause on a first date, this is gonna be quick, probably painful and
will most likely include more than one embarrassing revelation:

vote smart.jpgCHI-CITY POLITICKIN!

Today is election day here in the Chi.  Rahm.  Carol.  Chico.  Some other guy.  Those are your choices for mayor.  Oh… I mean, those are your Democratic party choices.  In this town, Republicans just hang out at the local deep dish joint and get fat, occasionally showing up to an event to slam a Democrat or two.  Such slams are rarely heard.  Like they say, if a tree falls…

And don’t worry.  When I showed up to vote this morning I didn’t let that pesky ghost of Ron Santo standing outside the polling center sway me.  And judging by the turnout (or lack thereof), I don’t think anyone else is voting him in either.

Some things never change… like…


So, will you or won’t you, dear readers?  Will you follow my jaded and oft lugubrious colleague, Mr. Allen Krause, to the trenches of a baseball-less existence… all to stick it to a guy (assuming Bud Selig does have proper male anatomy) who doesn’t care, who isn’t listening, who won’t get it anyway?  Are you really ready to stay home and watch Maury all day instead of batting practice?  Are you prepared to sulk in the reality that is a soulless sports sanctuary that includes *cough* the NBA and NHL?  You do know that this has nothing to do with forcing change (why bring it up just now after all these years?) and everything to do with misery loves company, right?

It’s true dear readers… and it’s all the fault of…

allen loves the tigers.jpgDRINKY MIGGY!

Who else is to blame for Mr. Krause’s sudden bout of revolutionary activism?  Why it can only be his beloved man-crush Miguel Cabrera, of course!  With Miggy’s er… uh… “issues” causing alarm throughout the Tigers organization, Mr. Krause knows that his team’s season could be well over before it even starts.  And that is why he is rushing to react, to draw in troops, to overthrow the baseball world so we all lose sight of Detroit slipping below Kansas City in the win column.

Believe it.  Or don’t.  Just don’t say you weren’t warned by someone in the know.

And… don’t hate me.  ‘Cuz I’m right.




  1. russelw

    I’m all for the right cause, as long as I don’t have to do anything 🙂

    Or in this case, not not do something. Have your walk out or no-show in Detroit, I’ll be in Wrigley, drinking $28 Old Style and eating $15 nachos. Then I’ll probably buy a new $75 Cubs hat because they come out with a new version every year. If they win I’ll proclaim it the best money I ever spent. If they lose I’ll say that we got F’d by the umps.

    Baseball Fever – catch it

  2. blithescribe

    Hear, hear. (and I always suspected Allen harbored a hidden love for Mauer) If I’m going to throw myself on my sword just to make a statement, it had better be an effective one. Not showing up to Opening Day games that pretty much every would be boycotter has already purchased non refundable tickets for isn’t exactly going to make an effective statement. It’s quite clear that Selig doesn’t care about fans’ enjoyment of the game, so if we’ve already given him our money, what does he care if we show up or not?
    The Revolution will not be televised and it darned well better not come between me and my Opening Day precious. 😉

  3. redstatebluestate

    Russel — Dude! I know! I have consumed more than my share of billion dollar Old Styles… I’d pay a billion more if they’d stop playing that “Go Cubs Go” abomination of a song.
    Kristen — Yes… that’s what I’m talkin’ about. Who does Krause think he is anyway? Onward and upward!

  4. redstatebluestate

    I don’t think Allen can top me in, well, anything, Jane… so let’s just say my heart breaks harder than his when it comes to unsatisfactory man-crushes 😉

Leave a Reply to blithescribe Cancel reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s