Subject: Johanna Mahmud
Occupation: Trombonist, Rockstar, RSBS Writer/Collaborator
Last seen doing odd things to Bernie Brewer, Mr. Mahmud is rumored to be considering a legal separation from his beloved Cubbies. In fact, the Cubs faithful fear they may have lost one of their more ornery contemporaries to the luxuries of… not being a Cubs fan.
“Look at these people,” he said, staring at a sea of Brewers fans, “these people… they’re… happy.”
If you have any information as to the whereabouts of Mr. Mahmud, please inform RSBS officials, or, at the very least, kindly notify Ronnie Woo Woo, who desperately wants his sequined Sandberg Cubbie thong back.