In order to make Mr. Krause feel good on his birthday, I thought I’d post some images of things that would make him happy. So I did a Google image search for “hot girl + Detroit Tigers”. I got zilch (not surprised). Instead, I offer these titillating images, each one sure to make him smile:
HAPPY BIRTHDAY, FRIEND!
Despite knowing my friend, Jeff Lung, for more than a decade now, I’m always surprised by how I can still see him in new and different lights. There’s Jeff playing baseball:
And of course there’s Jeff in the nonexistent backseat of a minivan:
For today is January 15! And that means today is Mr. Allen Krause’s 31st birthday!
And since it is my jaded pal’s special day, I thought it best not to rip on how he looks like like a young (albeit more intelligent) Joe Maddon; so instead I am going to go against the RSBS norm and actually do something nice for him!
That’s right, folks. Y’all know that Al is a huge (sometimes annoying) Detroit Tigers fan… so today, to help Mr. Krause celebrate his very own life, I would like to present three awesome Detroit Tigers facts that I researched all by myself (with the help of the RSBS interns).
Happy Birthday, Al old buddy!
Awesome Tigers Fact #1:
Since the birth of Allen Krause, the Detroit Tigers have lost 2,546 games! And that fancy schmancy fact includes four whole seasons with 103 or more losses, like that stellar 2003 season when the Tiggers lost a mind-blowing 119 games!
Awesome Tigers Fact #2:
Despite being Mr. Krause’s boyhood hero while boasting impressive numbers over 20 Major League seasons, good old Alan Trammell is NOT in the Hall of Fame! For real! I’m serious!
Awesome Tigers Fact #3:
This fella made $10 million in 2009 while putting up these gaudy numbers: 1 W, 7.49 ERA, 7.5 BB/9
I have known Mr. Krause for over twelve and a half years now and I can honestly say — without even a smidgen of doubt — that one couldn’t ask for a better friend than Allen.
And I mean the hell out of that.
Happy Birthday, brother!
I have to apologize to all of you. I failed. See, yesterday was a very important day and I didn’t even say anything about it. Oh, I made the right phone calls and sent the correct text messages. I even added the appropriate email. But, when it came to our readers here at RSBS, well, plain and simple I dropped the ball. Or perhaps the more fitting metaphor is that I let the ball dribble between my legs for a base hit.
So, what is it that is so important that I’m now forced to wear a hairshirt while self-flagellating? Only the 30th birthday of one Jeffery Lung, that’s what! Yes, yesterday Jeff turned 30 years young and was finally allowed to join me in the pantheon of……whatever it is that 30 year old people are allowed to do. Regular colonoscopies? Yearly prostate exams? Whatever it is, suffice it to say that we are both there now.
Now, in order to properly show my shame, I am going to perform a penance that will prove how awful I feel. Jeffy, I hope you enjoy this. It will never happen again.