While writing the filibuster the other day, I got to thinking. What’s so bad about MLB taking over the Dodgers? It’s not something they want to do and ideally they’d like to get rid of the franchise as quickly as possible. Both MLB and the Dodgers hope to emerge from this more healthy. The weird thing is that as I considered all the aspects of this move, it began to feel a little like deja vu. I had the distinct feeling that I had read this story before. Then it hit me. This same story happened just recently with a little company called General Motors, and the US Government played the role in which MLB now finds itself.
Just like today’s Dodgers, GM found itself in trouble because of profligate spending, terrible management and an inability to provide the consumer what they demanded. As it became clear that GM could no longer support its obligations and refused to make the changes needed to resolve its issues, the government stepped in.
Just like with MLB’s decision to take over the Dodgers, the government’s decision with GM had its share of detractors. Although I don’t think anyone outside of San Francisco truly wants to see the Dodgers fail as a franchise, a fair amount of the fringe right and left wing in the US were more than happy to watch GM collapse. While refusing to see what impact GM’s dissolution would have on an already fragile economy, these people decided that the moral obligation was to let GM collapse as an example to other firms. Obviously this was not an option for the government, just like McCourt’s continued ineptitude with one of baseball’s storied franchises was not an option for MLB and the commissioner.
The real moral of this story comes in the aftermath. GM quickly emerged from its bankruptcy and government receivership. More importantly, not only did it emerge more streamlined and healthy after government managers got rid of deadweight makes and models, it also set a record with its IPO. MLB is hoping for a similar outcome and looks to be using an important tool that the government also utilized with GM: get rid of the management who got you into this problem in the first place.
Since GM rose phoenix-like from its own ashes, those who criticized the initial move have become much more subdued in their comments. Although the level of criticism hasn’t been quite as great with MLB and the Dodgers, I have a feeling that even those who have decried Selig’s actions will end up eating their words once the Dodgers are resold. Takeovers are always painful but they aren’t always bad.
General Motors is busted.
My dignity (whatever there was of it) is also busted.
And in case you haven’t noticed, the 2009 Washington Nationals are most definitely busted.
Now I realize that it has become cliché hack to go after the lowly Natinals and all their shame — that by marauding these lesser-known squibs I am just one of many basement-confined jokesters, another savvyless cheapshotateer who gets off on landing lowblows wherever I can.
But that’s me.
‘Cuz when you’re bad, you’re bad; and the Washington Nationals are beyond bad.
With a sub-stellar 13-36 record as of the first of June, touting a team ERA of 5.69 and Kip Wells in the bullpen, I think it is time we US Americans seriously consider showing the Washington Nationals a big-time government bailout.
Because if Julian Tavarez can’t save the Nationals, then who in the world can?
GM made crappy cars. For years, GM didn’t listen to its consumers. Simply put, GM didn’t care. They were/are insane: doing the same thing over and over again, expecting different results. And now GM is virtually as obsolete as their “planned obsolescence” business model: an absolute example of eating your own s*** and dying a terrible death.
Luckily, there is still hope for the Washington Nationals, albeit grim. Despite fielding a beer-league softball team, they are averaging about 21,000 people per game. And even if half of those fans are wearing the visiting teams’ duds, that money is still green.
If the government knows anything, it knows how to take money from everyday Joes like us and spend it irresponsibly. So, save the franchise, Capitol Hill! I don’t care about GM, but I do care about about the
Montreal Expos Washington Nationals and they deserve my tax dollars because let’s face it, Adam Dunn has gotta eat (a lot).
Don’t hate me ‘cuz I’m right.
(GM Image courtesy of the Cleveland Leader)
Round two of the Cubs/Cardinals rivalry kicked off Friday night and once again the game wobbled in the unsteady hands of each club’s respective bullpens.
Ryan Franklin was a success.
Carlos Marmol was not.
If you don’t know by now, Albert Pujols is a baseball god. He hits for average. He hits for power. He steals bases. He motivates his teammates. I would rather donate half my salary to the Republican Party, sit on Rush Limbaugh’s lap and make out with Ann Coulter while listening to the entire Barry Manilow catalogue than piss off Pujols.
No wonder Franklin got the job done.
As for Marmol, well, can anyone blame him for yet another failure? His manager hates him. He has no clearly defined role on the team. And he just found out that General Motors is pulling the plug on the Pontiac line!
Life just ain’t fair; I couldn’t be happier.
Don’t hate me ‘cuz I’m right.
(*Base images courtesy of the Associated Press)