Tagged: Josh Hamilton

Crack Kills and Other Stuff You Already Knew

Are you paying attention to all this, Josh Hamilton?

Whitney Houston’s death — while not a surprise — is a sad story indeed.  In fact, anytime a colossal talent such as hers is lost to the underworld translates into a melancholy tale; but her spotlighted career the last decade and a half has been more than that.  It’s been a messy train wreck in slow motion.  I’ve just been waiting for it to stop.

Now it’s stopped.  For good.

Addiction ain’t no joke.  And it cares not who it destroys.  You can be the best singer in the world or the most talented athlete on the diamond.  It doesn’t care.  It will consume you if you don’t get help.

I only hope that people are paying attention.

With that in mind, Mr. Krause made me hip to one of Whitney’s lesser-known interweb gems.  Here, take a look for yourself: *Vid Link*.  (For some reason, all embedding of this video — and ones like it — has been disabled)  Make sure you pay special attention to Monsieur Gainsbourg at the 58 second mark.

Call me crass, but that’s a Whitney moment to remember.  She was hot.  She had the best voice on the planet.  And the entire world was at her service.  Yet none of the above was enough to slay the dragon of addiction.

The damn thing breathes fire.

Don’t hate me ‘cuz I’m right.

Peace,

Jeff

Can I Talk to You About Mohammed?

Muslims don’t have a tradition of proselytizing.  Sure, they conquered other societies and let them convert if they wanted to, but sending people out as missionaries wasn’t really part of the program.  Even now, Muslim societies with money tend to send that money to Muslim neighbors to strengthen whatever sect within the religion they support.  In short, it’s not very likely that a Saudi is going to knock on your door anytime soon and ask if you’ve had a chance to meet Allah.

In the US, we’ve taken a slightly different tack.  Instead of breaking away from the missionary traditions of our European forefathers, we’ve taken it to all new heights.  It’s not enough that American churches feel compelled to send evangelical missionaries all over the world to teach and convert, they also do the same at home.  And all too often these efforts are aimed at the most vulnerable among us: children.

It’s not just churches.  It’s also role models like sports stars.  When Tim Tebow and Jeremy Lin go beyond sports and feel the need to bring Jesus up in every interview, it’s a message to children.  It’s proselytizing.  When Josh Hamilton has to tell people that Jesus saved him from the drugs, that’s a message to children as well.  And as far as I’m concerned, raping children’s minds in this way is just as bad as what someone like Jerry Sandusky did.

There’s a very simple solution to all this:

So, how about it people?  How about we keep it in our pants?  I won’t show you mine if you don’t show me yours.

-A

Setting the Mahmud

RSBS Special Correspondent and part time ninja, Mr. Johanna Mahmud reports:

Sunday in the Park with George

I want children so I can play dodge ball with them or at the very least have them pose while I paint a mural of them getting eaten by large cats for my own amusement. But that’s not why I called…

In my favorite Mandy Patinkin musical he sings “I need to finish the hat” in the role of George Seurat. Or as Groucho famously said “I refuse to join any club that would have me as a member.” Or as Josh Hamilton is probably saying “there are no bars in hospitals and that’s why people hate hospitals.”

I don’t know about the Cubs’ chances for 2012, but I do know I want a Sunday in the park with a friend. I want to think nice things as baseball approaches but sometimes you just don’t know what hell is coming. Sometimes I feel like Lisbeth of the Dragon Tattoo movies: I just get shot in the DAMN head when I think of the 162 Cubs games that are coming.

Finishing the hat,
How you have to finish the hat.
How you watch the rest of the world
From a window
While you finish the hat.

I don’t know if I’m finishing the hat or if Theo is.

–Johanna Mahmud
Follow Johanna on Twitter!

Freedom of Christianity

When Josh Hamilton says, “It’s a god thing,” he’s applauded for standing up for his faith.  When Tim Tebow kneels down and prays, 43% of people who know of Tebow think that god helps him win.  And when Muhammad Ali cited his faith as the impetus for his conscientious objection to the draft, America celebrates his principled stand.  Oh, wait.  I guess that’s not exactly what happened.

You can argue that Ali is different because of patriotism or the like but it’s hard to say that patriotism alone accounts for what happened to Mahmoud Abdul-Rauf while playing for the Denver Nuggets.  The truth of the matter is, despite our vaunted “Freedom of Religion,” the expression of that freedom really only seems to apply to Protestant Christians and the occasional Catholic.  And let’s face it, if you ask the question “What if Tim Tebow were Muslim?” you already know the answer.  God help him if he were an out-and-proud atheist.

-A

The RSBS Podcast, Episode 29: Remembering Ugueth’s Urbina and Other Stuff

Click ME to Listen!!!

And so in this Podcast brought to you by Lifestyles

Jeff tries his darnedest to be as polite as possible during his unfettered gloating of World Championship status (Go Cards!) while Second City’s Mark Piebenga adds some level-headed awesomeness to Johanna’s outlandishness and Allen’s seasoned straight man routine.  Among the topics of discussion are “the greatest game ever”, the woes of rebranding an already twice championed franchise (talkin’ to you, Marlins), Theo Fever in the Chi, b!tch t!ts and much, much more!

Now grab some Crown Royal and enjoy yo’ self!

– – –

Subscribe to the RSBS Podcast by clicking *HERE*

Subscribe via iTunes by clicking *HERE*

*Special thanks to our PodMaster Keith Carmack. Follow Keith on on Twitter and make sure to check out his crew and their gut busting Undercast! podcast.

– – –

Recorded Saturday, November 12, 2011

Things I’m Doing While Waiting for Game Three

1.  Remembering that no one gave us a chance in 2006 either

2.  Sending a boatload of chicken, beer and video games to the Rangers’ clubhouse

3.  Whisky

4.  Encouraging Wash to use Ogando against Craig, again and forever

5.  Trying to find a reason to hate the Rangers (it’s hard!)

6.  Beer

7.  Watching — over and over and over again — Waino’s snappy curve to strikeout Inge in ’06

8.  Driving by Wrigley Field, reminding myself that LIFE COULD ALWAYS BE WORSE

9.  Organizing a harem of hotties to stand outside of Josh Hamilton’s house with an 8-ball and body shots

10.  Whisky and beer

Happy Saturday, Y’all!

Jeff

Three Up, Three Down

quick and painful.jpg
Just like Ryan Franklin in the 9th, this is going to be quick, disgustingly ugly and will probably include an ERA over 9:

Jesus saved Josh Hamilton.jpgJESUSY JOSHY!

First he tried to score from third when no one was lookin’… then he slid head first and broke his arm… then he was… out.  THEN he blamed third base coach Dave Anderson for the boneheadedly aggressive move (not my fault, duh)… and THEN he later apologized to Dave Anderson for blaming him for the boneheadedly aggressive move. 

*SARCASM ALERT, SARCASM ALERT*

Considering the overwhelming, undeniable, empirical evidence in this case… I am glad to report that Jesus of Nazareth was soley responsible for Joshy’s change of heart, just as he was responsible for Joshy gettin’ some buttery nipple action at da club a while back.

HOLLA!

BERKMAN FOR MVP!

Berkman smiling.jpgThe 2011 season is well under way and… SURPRISE!!!… that’s Lance Berkman posing at the Cardinals best player!

Hey folks, he may be weird lookin’ in a Redbird uni, but he’s the only one in the lineup who’s been solid from the get-go.  Go ahead, Albert… just go ahead and think about finding a deal somewhere else… we got number 12!

THE GO-GO-HOME WHITE SOX!

Ozzie Guillen sure is giving Timothy Geithner a run for his money (wink, wink) in the sour face department.  Heck, I’d be angry too if my son’s name was Oney (good grief is that really his name???)… I’d also be angry if my team scored runs like crazy, only to see them erased in the latter innings of an otherwise locked-down ballgame when the bullpen wheels start fallin’ off (see Chris Sale, Matt Thornton, etc.).

Can’t believe I’m sayin’ this, but, I sorta miss big boy Bobby Jenks.  At least with Jenks you’d at least see some emotion when he blew the game. 

Hangin’ the head and walkin’ off is a bit too pedestrian for my liking.

disaster zone.jpg
Happy Friday!

Jeff